Things That Make You Go Hmmm ... Part Deux

I haven't blogged in quite some time. I've been trying to find something to write about that would be worthy of whomever decided to make the 100th visit to my blog, but I think I've been suffering from writer's mono. It's much more serious than writers block, believe me. You're unable to lift heavy topics for blogging because your spleen might burst, and you're so tired you may just pass out at the keyboard.

I've asked my vastly expanded follower base on Twitter for a few suggestions (I appreciate you all!), but it appears that the idea well is a bit dry at the moment. I suppose that's to be expected. We are, after all, coming up on Memorial Day weekend so people are thinking about grilling, how they're going to fit into their swimsuits as that last minute bleach-banana-peel-and-cayenne-pepper cleanse diet just didn't quite do the trick, and battling the traffic on the roads. That being said, I think it's time I revisit "Things That Make You Go Hmmm" and put it in for a second installment. Below you will find a list of some more things that have made me go "hmmm" recently.

• Still wondering since I first wrote it, What, exactly, is Lady Gaga? And why do I keep buying his/her/its songs?
• Why am I so damned addicted to "Glee?"
• "Glee" will be featuring songs by Lady Gaga tonight. Did my mention of the above two bullet points just create a black hole in the universe?
• How is it that Heidi Montag Pratt decided to follow me on Twitter?
• Who has their head shoved further up their collective asses in relation to the BP Oil spill - BP for not having a book FULL of contingency plans in case there was an oil spill, the Federal Government for not having their own book AND for now having to rely on BP's non-existent book of contingency plans, or Sarah Palin for saying that this whole thing is the Fed's fault. (I'm sorry, lady, but weren't you creaming your GOP purchased panties whenever a crowd broke out into "Drill Baby, Drill!" not all that long ago?)
• Two words. Rand Paul.
• Three words. The Tea Party.
• Why do I find it so difficult to be snarky and witty in the maximum 140 characters when I Tweet?
• Why am I hungry right now? I just ate something. Damnit.
• How did Paris Hilton's full album get on to my iPod?
• Where should I go on vacation this summer? I really have to get away ...
• Do my Twitter followers and readers of this blog wonder if I'm a chick or a dude or if I'm more than one person?
• Is "Things That Make You Go Hmmm" going to be a regular blog post here at "The Incident Report?"
• What asshole at Millions of Milkshakes decided that Perez Hilton fell into the "celebrity" category and let him come up with his own milkshake flavor?
• If I could be a celebrity, what would my milkshake flavor be?
• Why haven't I won the lottery yet? Statistics be damned!
• Why can't a judge send Lindsay Lohan to jail before she kills someone or herself?
• When will I do the next installment of "Things That Make You Go Hmmm?"

Tune in regularly to find out. Remember, if you have a topic that you'd like me to try and conquer here at The Incident Report, send it to me on Twitter where you can find me as @IncidentReport. Thanks for your support and see you in cyberspace!

- The Incident

Oh Really, Idiot?

Sometimes, things make me really angry. That usually happens to people. I think the thing that makes me the most angry is ignorance. And I saw a tweet about some news today that made me really angry because of someone's ignorance.

I think it's pretty well known that the Holocaust happened. There were Nazi's and they wanted to wipe out the Jewish people and they had a leader named Adolf Hitler. There was a really big war that came about to try and get that Hitler guy out of power. Kids are taught about this in schools across the world. Germany, as a nation, is still pretty sensitive about the whole thing. There are memorials to those lives lost - both in concentration camps and in the war fought to end it - all over the world. There are Holocaust survivors and war survivors, and even former Nazis still around (and, sadly, neo-Nazi's). Yet there are still people who would deny that this monumental event in history happened.

The name of one such denier comes to mind. Iran's Mahmud Ahmadinejad.

This bone head thinks the Holocaust didn't happen. And as if that wasn't enough to piss me off, he keeps running his mouth about how 9.11 was a fabrication invented by the US Government to validate going to war in Afghanistan and fighting the war on terror.

AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

Now, I was not around for WWII. But I sure as hell was around for 9.11. And ladies and gentleman, I realize that Hollywood has come a long way in the special effects department, but this guy has GOT TO BE KIDDING ME.

There's video footage from numerous sources of those planes going into those buildings and what happened thereafter. There's the phone calls from the Hero flight before those folks stormed the cockpit to protect the other terrorist target (widely presumed to be the US Capitol Building in Washington, DC) as well as phone calls from people inside the buildings that had been hit too. So, Mr. Moron-Dictator-Who-Only-Has-One-Khaki-Pants/Jacket-Combo-Suit, are you trying to tell me that was a giant, sci-fi plot that the US Government concocted in cahoots with mega Hollywood producers? You think we took down the Twin Towers and demolished part of the Pentagon with the help of some green screens and some stunt doubles?

Let me tell you, pal ... if American politicians can't even get together to fix healthcare and help get the US economy back on track, what in the hell makes you (again, talking directly to Ahmedinejad-the-Ignorant here) think that American politicians could come together and pull something like THAT off?

And let's just examine yet another fundamental flaw in Ahmadinejad's theory. Does anyone out there recall where the US has focused most of its military efforts since 9.11? Anyone? Anoyone? Bueller?

That would be Iraq. Not Afghanistan. So we're supposed to buy in to this bullshit he's spewing about the US pulling off the 9.11 attacks on themselves so they could go attack Iraq, wait a little while, and then go to real, serious war in Afghanistan.

How is this guy still in power? I'm really, really saddened to believe that he was elected by the people (or rather, that he was able to push enough weight around and bully his way back in to power). But perhaps the most sad part is that there are people out there who believe this kind of nonsense and who are so ignorant that they think these things. UGH!

- The Incident

Is That A Tiger In Your Pocket or Are You Just Happy to See Me?

So I read something that really irked me as I am a fan of animals - they can't talk, they can't always stand up for themselves ... someone has to give them a break. So, whilst I perused the Internet, I came across a story about a plan Indonesia has to rent out tigers.

I will repeat that.

Rent. Out. Tigers.

Here's the link to the story: http://tinyurl.com/yzko3r4. But seriously people? Renting out TIGERS? I suppose the intentions behind this tremendously sick and twisted idea are only the best. Renting a Sumatran Tiger (only about 400 left in Indonesia) would have a pretty high price tag - $107,100 US. This money would help to assist with conservation efforts. But what I think it really boils down to is this question: didn't everyone learn a lesson when that lady gave her pet Chimp a Xanax to calm him down and he proceeded to rip her best friend's face off (a very special thank you to Oprah, by the way, for taking that lady's hat/mask thing off and proving that she didn't have a face anymore. Really appreciated that one. As if my overactive imagination wasn't enough to fill that image void in the old brain.) What kind of screening will go in to this plan, if it's actually enacted? Just because you can pony up the dough does NOT mean that you are capable of keeping a live and wild animal in your home. What if junior decides that kitty needs a bath? What if Fido gets a little too close to the cage?

I really hope that the people who are attending this summit to save these animals from extinction have a few more tricks up their sleeves because "Rent A Tiger" just does not seem like a viable option.

- The Incident