You’re Getting A Sandwich At What Location?

First and foremost, let me just say … The Incident is back! After a pretty decent hiatus, I am back with more energy, more happiness, and more snarky commentary that some of you have come to know and love.

Now, onward we go to today’s blog (again, a topic recommended to me by a devoted and delightful Twitter follower – that’s right, you suggest it and I’ll take a stab at blogging it!). So here’s the question: Why has Twitter started offering people the ability to include their location in their Tweets, or perhaps more importantly, why are people using this functionality?

To be perfectly frank, I just don’t freaking get it. At all. Perhaps that’s because I prefer my anonymity – I like to write under a pen name and let people think of me what they will. It’s like I’m a character in a book … you can get your own picture of me in your head, see what I look like, what I would do in certain situations, etc. And the imagination is a very fun thing. But then the movie version comes out and the director has cast me as someone VERY different than what you had imagined. All of the sudden, in the movie version, I’m doing something that you know (or at least that your imagination knows) I would never really do. And that takes the fun out of it.

I suppose for certain celebrities or people who aren’t anonymous on Twitter, this functionality makes sense. If you have a Twitter account and a lot of your friends are following you, then they can see that you’re getting a sandwich at the corner of Main and Maple Streets and, if they too are in the neighborhood, they can come meet up with you. Although why a celebrity would want to publish where they’re getting their nails done or picking up their dry cleaning is a bit beyond me. Yes, please do give the paparazzi another reason to destroy your life. Unless of course you’re a “celebrity” for no real reason and you’re grasping at straws to hang on to the public eye (Heidi Montag Pratt comes to mind – poor little dear). Now for Heidi to publish where she’s getting her nails done, or where she’s going to get her latest plastic surgery taken care of so that perhaps a paparazzi will follow (or a crazed fan), then I guess it makes sense too.

And then there is Chad “Ochocinco” Johnson. (Sidebar: If I ever meet him, I will say, “Chad Johnson, it is a pleasure to meet you.” I will NOT address him as “Ochocinco.” I can’t even begin to imagine what his mother and father thought when he legally changed his name.) This guy apparently doesn’t have a personal assistant. Rather, he will tweet or post on Facebook where he is or what he’s doing and ask his followers for help. In Miami and looking for a good mechanic? He posts and, within minutes, his fans from all across the world give him suggestions. Not sure how to use that pesky new XM Radio? No problem! Just ask your civilian friends for help and the suggestions will come pouring in. In this instance of the Twitter “I’m at X location,” I can see how one can benefit and frankly, I applaud him for saving money and using this functionality for everything it’s worth!

At any rate, like I said, for those of us who prefer to remain anonymous like characters in a good novel, this functionality is a killer. If you knew where we were, then you might start to think of us differently. And where indeed is the fun in that?

- The Incident